Relationship with God NOT Religion
Religion today is OUTWARD Appearance (following rules, doing things to earn salvation), but Following Jesus happens from in INWARD Transformation (grace transforms you, you stop living as a sinner).
Religion today is reliant on the person, to try not to sin, to try and do things to look like you have a good heart: go to church, serve, share the Gospel, tithe, take communion, etc. But the New Testament DOES NOT say you are saved by your efforts. The New Testament mentions the word “repent” roughly 54-64 times. The New Testament talks about grace NOT works saving you.
6 And if by grace, then it cannot be based on works; if it were, grace would no longer be grace. – Romans 11:6
REPENT -> RECEIVE THE HOLY SPIRIT (Christ in You, God in you) & GRACE PROVIDES POWER TO RESIST SINNING (Miraculous, Supernatural Power)
“No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him.” – 1 John 3:6
HOW TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD
PERSONAL NOTE: I am so excited to share this with you! This is like things that have taken me a year to learn, and some people still don’t quite understand after many years. After I got saved, I knew God had big plans for me, and I was like, “I want to learn, I want to figure out what is deception and what is truth, and grow fast, I want to walk in my gifts.” And God has grown me in ways I could have never imagined were possible. It is crazy how much I have grown in a year and like 3 months.
The key to my growth is: My Relationship with God. I wouldn’t have much spiritual wisdom, if I didn’t spend time in my relationship with God. But YES, God gets ALL the glory!!!
When you are born again, you enter into a relationship with God. Everything you do is centered around that relationship (prayer, reading scripture, giving, going to church, worship, obeying), etc. MOST IMPORTANTLY, God changes your heart and mind to not want to sin, and you must listen and turn from sin.
Your relationship with God consists of spending time with God (talking, listening) prayer, scripture, worshipping, being obedient. You should do these things even when you don’t feel like it. Because you can’t grow in a place of comfort. If you are truly born again, you should want to make time for God.
If you don’t spend time with God, temptations to sin will become easier. Listen, this is not religious activity, as the Holy Spirit is going to leave you the day you just didn’t read the scripture, or the day you didn’t make much time for prayer, or the one moment you sinned. You repent and move forward. You were NOT saved by your efforts, but by what Jesus did on the cross.
When we feel tempted to sin, when we struggle with fear, anxiety, depression, then you must ask yourself: Are you spending enough time with God? Are you listening to God? Having you been neglecting to read scripture? To pray? When was the last time you worshipped?
(Reminder: This is for those born again, as I mentioned in my discernment blog, after you have the Holy Spirit the scripture specifically the New Testament will start to make more sense, and because of the Holy Spirit you can go deeper into scripture. The Holy Spirit teaches you things.)
What Does a Healthy Relationship Look Like?
To have a healthy relationship with your spouse you need to spend time with them, right? Or your child? (no spouse, no child, whatever is your next closest relationship). Let’s say you have a kid, you would want them to spend time with you, right? God is the same. He is your parent who wants to spend time with you. He wants you to know who He is!!!
3 Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. – John 17:3
He wants you to love him. You would want your child to love you, and know they can come to you with all their problems.
5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.
– Deuteronomy 6:5
5 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. 6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. – Proverbs 3:5–6
You want your kids to trust you. God wants you to trust him. So, you become a child going to your father asking questions, asking how you can grow, asking about all major life decisions, you also vent to God about your worries the way you would talk openly with a therapist or your closest friend.
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:6-7
You turn from sins God points out because you trust they are harmful to you. When you’re a young child your parent warns you about dangerous things, teaches you how to treat other people, etc. And in a healthy parent/child relationship you listen because you trust they are protecting you.
23 Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. – John 14:23
(Note: This is one reason salvation prayers pastors give often don’t work. People don’t understand that they are giving up their sin. They have to want to be obedient to God. So, the Holy Spirit doesn’t make a home in them.)
I love that Chris and I don’t have to figure everything out on our own anymore. I love hearing from God. I’m not afraid to talk to God about anything. I have no shame, nothing to hide, it isn’t a relationship where I approach God with fear or shame, but I approach him knowing there is great love. I’m no longer a slave to sin, but an adopted child of God.
Note: You are on a journey after you are born again to taking on Jesus’ character traits, following more closely in his footsteps. This doesn’t happen overnight, it is a continuous journey. As when you are born again, you have this great awareness of all the sinful things you’ve been doing. But as you listen and obey, you then get to a more peaceful place.
15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” – Romans 8:15
I approached God with fear and trembling when I repented, and I still had a lot of fearful thoughts after I was saved (the thoughts were not from God), but now I approach God knowing he is pleased with me. The creator of all things calls me his daughter. I love that. I feel God with me as I write.
And, “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.” – 2 Corinthians 6:18
Note: This is a very basic overview. There is so much more I could say, and so much more I feel I have yet to learn. In some ways, I feel like a young child learning what is to have a relationship with my Father, my God. You learn as you go. But I’m spiritually growing in ways I can’t even begin to explain to you, and I know I’m right where I need to be. I know because I seek God – I ask Him questions, I pray, I read the scripture. I know if I was doing something wrong, the Holy Spirit would make it known to me, or tell me through Chris or someone else if I wasn’t listening.
RELIGION is No More
14 Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross; – Colossians 2:14
The ordinances were the rules and laws that they received in the Old Testament the Levitical Law. We are no longer under rules and regulations that outwardly look good, but under the Spiritual Law, and we experience an internal transformation when we have the Holy Spirit.
“This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.” – Hebrews 10:16
What Thoughts Our Yours?
After I was born again, I started recognizing when God was speaking to me. Sometimes I would recognize something is sinful by a feeling, and sometimes I hear God in my mind pointing out sinful things to me. There were even sinful habits that just vanished without me even trying to work on them through the power (grace) with the Holy Spirit. I could never find all my sinful habits on my own, or remove them by willpower alone. Christ in me makes it possible.
27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: – John 10:27 (those born again are the sheep)
The Holy Spirit also protects my mind, as I have spiritually grown. I receive less thoughts from demons (as demons give EVERYONE thoughts, but NO they can’t read your thoughts). Still, you have the ability to accept or reject the thoughts and choose whether or not to act on them. Yes, God reads your thoughts, demons can’t! View my blog: Holy Spirit as Your Anti-Virus Security System.
A thought that repeats and doesn’t align with scripture, this can be a demon attacking your mind. For example, before I was born again and even after I was saved, I kept hearing, “God doesn’t love you enough.” I kept searching for a false belief I had that it was attached to, but I couldn’t find anything. I would read about how much God loves me, and it still didn’t go. I finally realized it wasn’t my thought, and I came out of agreement with the lie using scripture. It vanished.
5 Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;
– 2 Corinthians 10:5
3 but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world. – 1 John 4:3
Problems with Regulations
Colossians 2:23 states: “These regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence” (NIV).
This verse is talking about religion. The Levitical Law couldn’t stop people from sinning in their thoughts. They could only outwardly make an effort to do good. They would follow rules, regulations, but they didn’t really have a relationship with God. We do know from scripture though certain people in the Old Testament received the Holy Spirit, not the same as today, but… David, Moses, prophets, priests, etc. We see they have a relationship with God.
So, following religious rules can look great, but it can’t stop selfish, sinful desires.
Legalism
The Pharisees would often make up extra rules for people to follow that were not biblical. This still happens today, along with having people follow parts of Levitical Law. Some preachers want people to dress up real fancy for church, instead of just coming as they are. Some tell people how they should cut their hair, how much jewelry is acceptable to wear, that they can’t eat certain foods, etc.
I’m sure you have heard someone say, “Christians don’t drink alcohol.” Well, it is morally wrong to get drunk (that is a sin). It is not a sin to have an alcoholic drink. It can be sinful on a case-by-case basis, it would be bad for a certain person to have alcohol if they are a former alcoholic or easily addicted. But truly, this is something the Holy Spirit makes known to each person individually. God may tell you to avoid alcohol in certain situations, or for some time if you are turning to it as a way to cope with stress.
It would be wrong for me to tell you what movies and TV shows a Christian should and shouldn’t watch. Chris and I sometimes are not sure if we should watch certain things, and one person will say, “I don’t feel this is good for us to watch.” For us personally, if one person says no, it is a no, and we find something else. The Holy Spirit is supposed to help you with these gray areas. It’s not black and white. My blog on Darkness was to open people’s eyes to being desensitized to evil/darkness and deception in the world. The intention isn’t to say this is what Christians watch and don’t watch. It is understanding how what we watch can cause us to sin, desensitizes us, etc.
If I point out to a born-again Christian something that is clearly sinful (not my interpretation of what is sinful, not a religious rule) then I need to be doing it because I’m concerned for them. A born-again Christian isn’t supposed to criticize a sinner for their sins, we are supposed to tell them the Gospel truth.
Why Legalism is a Problem:
- Replaces Grace: It teaches that human effort and rule-keeping save a person instead of a free gift from God. It demeans the work of Jesus.
- Adds Man-Made Rules: It invents extra rules that are not in the Bible and forces them onto other people.
- Creates Pride: People look down on others who do not follow the exact same list of standards.
- Misses the Point: It focuses on external actions while ignoring mercy, love, and internal change.
- Steals Joy: It turns faith into a heavy, joyless list of duties instead of a free relationship with God.
- Causes Burnout: It traps people in constant anxiety and fear because human performance always fails and fluctuates.
(I don’t use Ai to write my posts. But I did get help from Google Ai with this list.)
I wouldn’t say if you are born again legalism is taking your salvation from you, I suppose it could though if you stop being obedient as you attended a very religious church w/o the Holy Spirit. But truly it is a stumbling block to your growth and the gifts you receive after being saved!
When You are Told Real Christians Go to Church on Sunday,
Look at this:
16 “Let no man therefore judge you in meat, or in drink, or in respect of an holyday, or of the new moon, or of the sabbath days:” – Colossians 2:16
When someone guilts you into not showing up for “corporate church” on Sunday, or for doing something else. Here is the verse that says “nope.” This verse comes in the instructions in the New Testament for those “born again” not under religious rules.
I spend time with God every single day (every day is a holy day for me). I don’t need to go to church to find God. The church is in me.
I said it in my church blog, but I’ll say it again, if you find the RIGHT church it can benefit you, but the WRONG church can do the opposite!
On that note, I did find a church teaching the real Gospel truth that I go to because I want to, not because I will feel guilty if I don’t. Not to help with my salvation, I’m already saved!
Serving the Church
If you made a commitment to serve the church, then you better show up even if you are bit tired, and don’t feel like it. This is different because people are relying on you, and commitments are important (love your neighbor). However, if you start to dread going, you don’t love it, then you should make a change. Go because you love serving, not as religious activity to help with your salvation.
Being Obedient
What if God says, “I need you to go to church today.” Then, you go because that is being obedient, and it means there is something He wants you to learn, someone He wants you to help, or something else. We always listen to what God says knowing it is Him speaking. He won’t say something that doesn’t align with who He is from the scripture. But sometimes God speaks to us through other people, so always be discerning.
You could never walk into a corporate church building again and still be saved. Religion says Christians go to church, but you see the scripture says, “don’t let anyone judge you, for what you do on a holy day.” Also, nowhere in the New Testament is it set as a requirement that you must attend a corporate church to be saved.
I want to be clear, I’m not saying going to church is a religious activity, it is a religious activity if you have the wrong mindset.
In my next blog, I’m going to actually give you bulleted lists of “religious mindsets” vs “born-again mindsets” for going to church, prayer, reading scripture, sharing the Gospel, etc.
We do Good Works, but not to earn salvation.
We do it out of an overflow of love.
8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:9 Not of works, lest any man should boast. – Ephesians 2:8–9 (KJV)
17 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.” – James 2:17 (KJV)
When you are born again, you will do good works (this is the fruit talked about in this next verse), but you won’t have to try so hard. You focus on your relationship with the creator of all things, reading scripture, prayer, listening to God – obeying, worship, and it will be hard not to produce fruit.
5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. – John 15:5
NOTE: I recommend reading this a few times, as there is a A LOT here to absorb.
PART 2 is COMING SOON! It is mostly written, I will actually bullet point various religious thoughts vs born again thoughts. FREEDOM from Religion! YAY! (Another in-depth blog)
I’m here to help!
Please reach out if you are struggling with something I’m sharing or you are confused about something. I will not turn away anyone who needs some help. Every single person is important to God, and therefore I have love for everyone.
If you don’t have my personal contact information, please message me on The Wellness Resolution.
I have a Wellness Coach Certificate, I'm an entrepreneur, an innovator, writer, and artist. My expertise includes over 7 years of marketing, research, and developing content for holistic health businesses. Plus, my own personal journey of becoming chronically sick: understanding what went wrong, and finding a way to heal and live a healthier life. I have a passion for wellness with a wealth of knowledge surrounding: wellness, flaws in healthcare, root causes for chronic illnesses, and alternative treatments.